Tag: coping

Today’s coping tip is to broaden your perspective: read a different source of media.

I’m off to the UK today. I tend to read books a lot when I travel and not embrace too much media, but I’ll try something new today.

In general I aim to avoid a lot of news. I like David Perell’s advice: Don’t read the news and read independent writers. Books or things that might stand the test of time.

So I subscribed to the Browser for now. I’ll see how I like it for a few weeks.

I started to add a daily coping tip to the SQL Server Central newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here. All my coping tips are under this tag.

Today’s coping tip is to connect with someone from a different generation.

This tip makes me feel old. When I see “different generation” I used to think of someone older.

Now I think of someone younger.

At a large gym event last week I did this. There was a series of younger coaches that were from a local college to teach our teenagers. I took a few moments before and during breaks to chat with a young lady that I was assisting. She’s a senior in college, but she was proud she was born in the 1900s. 1999 to be exact, a year younger than my middle kid.

Still, we talked a bit about college and how our experiences were different and her experience as a D-1 athlete and me as a club one. It was interesting that many things were similar, but the intensity of our approaches to different aspects of life were very different.

It was a nice few moments one afternoon.

I started to add a daily coping tip to the SQL Server Central newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here. All my coping tips are under this tag.

Today’s coping tip is to try a new way to practice self-care and be kind to yourself.

One of the things that I learned to do better during the pandemic was take care of myself. I learned how to better gauge how I feel, accept shortcomings, while still striving when I can.

It’s Thanksgiving in the US and I’m grateful for so much of my life. I really have a very perfect life in almost every way.

That being said, sometimes times are tough. The last few weeks, and the next one, are busy and stressful. Prepping for the Summit, with lots of disparate commitments, then trying to cram in more prep this week before I leave the country for two weeks has been hard.

However, I have been learning to flow with life. I have had some long days, but there are times my wife is free, or she’s been unable to work, and so I take advantage of those times to do something with her. We’ve had a few dates, and had a few afternoons where we run errands. Sometimes I just lay in bed with her and watch something on TV.

That helps me recharge and cope with the busy times. The nature of our lives work well, and when we get the chance to spend time together, or one of us needs it, we try to take that time. We both know the other might need to then shift work to another time. I’mlikely to need to write or prep something at 9pm, just as she might need to go feed horses or take care of a chore at 9pm after a dinner.

We’re taking care of each other by being flexible and taking advantage of time together when we can.

I started to add a daily coping tip to the SQL Server Central newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here. All my coping tips are under this tag.

Today’s coping tip is to build new ideas by thinking “Yes, and what if…”.

I tend to look for the holes, problems, limitations, and downside of various proposals. I’ve always been good at finding potential issues and mitigating them. It’s a skill that served me well as a database administrator.

However, I’ve been trying to be more positive and opportunistic the last few years. I try to look for the upside. Not that I ignore the downside, but I try to look forward and up first.

This tip is interesting to me, and I had to use this recently. I coach competitive volleyball for teenagers and this year has been a little trying. A MH I thought would round out our team got moved to another one. Then I had a kid who was injured all of last year and I wasn’t sure how she would fit in the team. Then another kid dropped out. Instead of a strong 12 set of hand picked kids, I had 10, two of which I was unsure about. Worse, I really only have 1 MH.

However, my wife and I looked for the upside here. We know we can teach kids to pick up different roles and we’ve been successful growing athletes in ways they didn’t expect. We started to think what if we moved X to MH and then used Y as a RH. What if we look at a 6-2 instead of a 5-1 and find a way to skip the need for a sub in two of our rotations?

There are lots of ways to search out opportunity and this coping tip reminds me to do that in all parts of my life. Look for possibilities first.

I started to add a daily coping tip to the SQL Server Central newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here. All my coping tips are under this tag.