Tag: coping

I started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here. All my coping tips are under this tag.

Today’s tip is to ask other people about things they’ve enjoyed recently.

I love seeing others enjoy life. It could be family, friends, kids I coach, or even random people I might talk to. I rarely engage people, but it can be interesting when I do.

I thought about this, as the last two years have been times when fewer people are getting away, traveling, or even experiencing life. I mentioned this in other tips, but my wife and I took our kids to Las Vegas for New Year’s Even. The basis for that trip was asking a friend about their Thanksgiving holiday and hearing they’d done something similar with their kids.

I’ve had a few friends go to Hawaii in 2021, and I’ve always asked them how it went. My wife has never been, and I booked two trips (2020 and 2021), cancelling both because of concerns over how many things might be open for us.

I’ve chatted with a few others about their travels crossing borders, as I am anxious to get back to visiting new places. I am finding COVID to be more flu-like now with Omicron dominating, and I hope to get to a few new places this year. It’s always interesting to hear people’s thoughts, whether they feel as I do or are more concerned.

Lastly, I’ve pinged a few people about their outdoor adventures. I am hoping that we have a few new ones this year, so I’m curious how others experiences have gone.

I started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here. All my coping tips are under this tag.

Today’s tip is to challenge negative thoughts and look for the upside.

In a world where controversy, complaints, and negativity are readily available, it’s easy to get down when you look at the news, social media, or even chat with friends online. I find many people present a much poorer version of themselves online. Even in person, often they’ve been affected by the world, so I can find interactions often start of with negativity.

Personally, I have found that I can get down not only from media and information around me, but also from things not going well for me. Work, coaching, life, all have things that go wrong.

Note: things lightly go wrong for me. Overall my life is pretty amazing, so I am getting down about little things that in the grand scheme of the world, aren’t that important. I know this.

For me, and I’ve written about this in a few tips, I had a minor bit of bad news regarding my last health checkup. I’ve made some changes, and with reminders from my wife, am looking forward. I’m not upset that my diet is changed, I’m not overly concerned, and I’m working to keep a few slightly high numbers in perspective. My health isn’t in immediate or immanent danger, cutting back and changing lifestyle isn’t that much of an impact, and missing a few things (some food, alcohol, etc.) really isn’t that bad.

I’m staying positive, enjoying my gains, letting the feelings of missing things wash over me, experiencing them, and letting go.

I started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here. All my coping tips are under this tag.

Today’s tip is to choose one of your strengths and find a way to use it.

One of my strengths is that I can grind away at tasks and get things done. I’m careful not to overcommit (most times) and being able to focus helps me work through the items I do agree to work on.

For me, I’ve been using this personally for the last month. I started a diet with my wife, limiting food intake and avoiding alcohol. I haven’t had a drink from Jan 1 through Feb 1. I dropped my calorie intake to about 1500 cal/day.

This hasn’t been too bad, but I think a couple of things from my strength help here. First, I know I’m paying a bit of penance for using food and alcohol to cope during the pandemic, at least a bit too much. Second, I have a routine of 3-4 days that I rotate through, and a fairly limited set of choices that I don’t dislike too much. I’ve been able to just keep pushing through hard days and looking forward to a new meal the next day.

Overall it’s worked well. I went from about 236-226 in a month and while I’m rarely satisfied and often a little hungry, it’s not as bad as some attempts in the past.

I think the penance thing has played to my strength.