Tag: coping

  • Daily Coping 27 May 2020

    I’ve started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here.

    Today’s tip is to do something special today and revisit it in your memory tonight.

    I’m going to pick something that I did a few weeks ago, but it was special to me. That night it was something I revisited, and even today, I’ve rethought about it a few times.

    In graduate school, I rowed crew. For a year I was in an 8 man boat before I left to start my career and switching to a 4 man boat with some other older professionals. For three years, I rowed 3-4 times a week, mostly on the water. In the winter, I used a Concept 2 ergometer in the gym, and eventually bought one for home.

    Rowing was the hardest sport I’ve ever been involved in. It’s hard, and tiny changes across every stroke add up to big changes across thousands of meters. I was in the best shape of my life when rowing every week. Over time, I used the machine less and less and it became a basement decoration.

    During the last year, I’ve regularly gone to the gym for yoga, swimming, and weight lifting. I have used a stationary bike at home when I’m pressed for time. I used it during the initial weeks of the pandemic, but I wasn’t getting quite enough work in. I saw a few friends on Instagram and Facebook had been rowing regularly and even started a rowing challenge. 10k a day average for May. Do 9k one day, need to do 11k the next.

    I’d never rowed 10k on land in one sitting, topping out at 5k most of the time in my sessions. I started rowing again a couple times a week, trying to force myself to work harder. I did some 3ks, then some 5ks, and even tried some countdowns from 30:00 minutes (usually getting in about 6700m).

    One day I decided to take some advice from a friend and not aim for my old 2:00/500m pace from college. I’d been struggling with 2:03-2:05 paces mentally, and someone suggested I try pulling a 2:20/500m instead. I tried it, but after a few minutes, I was struggling to go that slow. Instead, I found a 2:08 pace was fine, and I switched after a couple minutes to a 2:10/500m goal. That’s easy to mentally compute on my 25 year old pace tracker.

    As I went along, I got to 5k at a bit over 20 minutes and I decided to push further. I kept the pace, only slowing slightly as I got to 7k, then 8k, then 9k. I finished with a bit over 10k.

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    A personal best, a lifetime best, and something that felt very daunting to me. I haven’t gone 10k again, but the 5k rows have been easier. I’ll do another 10k again soon, with more confidence than I had the first time.

  • Daily Coping 26 May 2020

    I’ve started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here.

    Today’s tip is to share an inspiring quote with others to give them a boost.

    I love quotes. One of the things I’ve been doing across the last year is not to just wish someone a Happy Birthday online, but find a quote that I think applies to them and gift it to them.

    There are some quotes I used often. Amazon once sent me a bookmark (when those mattered) with the quote “A room without books is like a body without a soul.” I love reading, and that one stays with me. Not very inspiring, but memorable. These days my books live in my mobile.

    Hope for the best, plan for the worst, from a Lee Child series, is one I always think about, but really that’s not inspiring either.

    When I think about inspiring someone, especially my kids or the kids I coach, I think about what has helped me in life. I’m certainly a grinder, someone that plods along and works hard. I’ve never been afraid of hard work, sometimes working too much. I’m not the smartest, or the quickest, but I do get things done.

    One quote that stands out to me is this: 千里之行,始於足下

    which is probably more familiar to you as: a journey of a thousand Chinese miles starts beneath one’s feet.

    I try to move forward. I have learned to relax and stop working, especially outside of work hours. I’ve learned to flex my schedule, taking care of things when needed, but also meeting the milestones and deadlines for my commitments at work. I’ve also learned to work across time, not being discouraged by a lack of progress today or daunted by a large undertaking.

    At least at work. I’ve gotten good there. In the rest of my life, I’m still learning, which is why this quote is something that inspires me. Hopefully this inspires you as well.

  • Daily Coping 25 May 2020

    I’ve started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here.

    Today’s tip is to share photos of 2 things you find meaningful or memorable.

    I’ve got lots of photos, but I’ll share two work related ones.

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    Before SQL Saturday Albuquerque, a few of us drove to Taos to ski for a day on Friday. We did this twice over the years, and it was an incredible memorable time with friends from Colorado, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, and more.

    The other photo that I think about a lot as a memory of work is this one. I had a lot of fun putting this together with people from Redgate, it makes me smile every time I see it.

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    What photos are memorable for you?

  • Daily Coping 22 May 2020

    I’ve started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here.

    Today’s tip is to reflect on what makes you feel really valued and appreciated.

    That’s an interesting thought. This reminds me of the Five Love Languages that help us learn to get along with others. What ways do I feel appreciated and valued?

    At work, it’s often through emails or comments people make to me. I’ve been lucky that SQLServerCentral grew to be popular, and my writing has entertained and inspired others. They have let me know often over the years, which give me some level of Purpose in life (from Danial Pink’s Drive).

    At home, when the family uses something I’ve built, or they find satisfaction in my cooking, I feel that they appreciate my efforts. That hasn’t always been the case, especially with the busy lives of my family, but they have certainly expressed enjoyment and appreciation of some of the things I’ve made. A few popular items lately: