Social: Stepping Back and Embracing a Difference of Thought

I do think that we want to have diversity, for a number of reasons, but this means in many cases, embracing differences. My editorial today is on Gatekeepers, which is one way of avoiding differences and diversity and searching for reinforcement of a view, idea, process, etc.

As the events of the last couple weeks have swept the globe in a completely different way from the COVID-19 pandemic, I find myself rethinking how I look at the world.

I am a minority in the US, and have a skin color that differs from most of the people in charge of my country and many organizations. I have experienced some discrimination in my life and had some scary moments where I feared for my safety.

However, I’m not black, I’m not a woman, and I’m not LGBTQ. I think overall, I’ve gotten off easy. I don’t quite fit in, and have felt uncomfortable more times than I’d like to admit, but I also get along most of the time and have enjoyed success in life.

I have also avoided being controversial in my career.

I’m changing some of that. I still think sex, politics, and religion are topics to avoid in most career situations, however, I don’t think these things fall into those areas:

  • Racism
  • Sexism/misogyny
  • human rights and fair treatment

I may lose some friends and contacts, and I have lost some. If you are unwilling to consider other thoughts, if you don’t want to consider your view might be wrong, if you don’t want to try and understand of there is any inherent or systemic issue with the state of majorities and minority treatment in the US or your country, feel free to move on.

I’ve been blessed and lucky, but I’m trying to rexamine my view and learn more. I’m confronting my privileges and those of others to try and understand what is a better way forward.

I am doing a few things. I wrote about changing my naming in git. I put down a couple books I was reading and picked up White Fragility. I’ve read more, about what Mark Cuban, Sal Khan, Tim Scott, and more. I’m trying to learn more and better understand how I view the world around me.

I am calling out hatred and poor behavior as I see it. Being conservative isn’t a problem. Trying to change the discussion from #BlackLivesMatter to #xxxLivesMatter is.

Many organizations have taken strong stances against racism. I hope this is heartfelt and not just marketing. Time will tell. I’ll be watching.

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Daily Coping 12 Jun 2020

I’ve started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here.

Today’s tip is to note the upsides during the lockdown, however small.

There are a number of upsides for me.

  1. More time with my kids, who are in college or out.
  2. I spend more time cooking, lower cost, building skills, family spends time together
  3. I play guitar more, especially with less travel
  4. Life is slower, and I can catch up on things I’d let go around the ranch.
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Daily Coping 11 June 2020

I’ve started to add a daily coping tip to the SQLServerCentral newsletter and to the Community Circle, which is helping me deal with the issues in the world. I’m adding my responses for each day here.

Today’s tip is smile and be friendly, even when you’re social distancing.

I try to smile and wave a lot at people. I think that has been one reason I get through life with relatively little conflict.

Wearing masks the last couple months has taken that away from me. I have tried to look at myself when smiling with a mark, and you see some of the signs, but wrinkle your nose in disgust and you see similar ones outside the mask.

Instead, I’ve tried to send more kind words out, since I can’t smile. However, when I am without a mask, I do try to smile more, especially at service workers who are helping us all out with their efforts and their risk.

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Next week is EightKB–The SQL Server Internals Conference

Next week, on Wednesday, June 17, 2020, the EightKB conference takes place. As with other events, it’s online, and it is full of high level content.

It looks to be an fun event, with these speakers:

  • Bob Ward
  • Erin Stellato
  • Joey D’Antoni
  • Pam Lahoud
  • Argenis Fernandez

An amazing group, brought together by Andrew Pruski (T|B), Mark Wilkinson (T|B), and Anthony Nocentino (T|B).

If you want an entertaining day of content, sign up today and enjoy the ride.

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